Survey

I'm Scared

    I'm standing in a time glass. The sand is flowing constantly, with no hesitation.  I'm scared, I don't know what's going to happen. What happens when all the sand hits bottom? Will I escape this glass prison or will I die here, gasping for air? My life could stop today. With the judge's final decisions. With every loss the sand flows even quicker, every gain it slows. Only when the final decision is made, is when I know. Do I move forward, standing taller and stronger then ever before or do I tumble backwards landing in my grave, marked with my name on a tombstone?  What will happen to me? When there's nowhere to run between insanity and confusion. What will happen to me?

Writing Prompt. My Day Dream

    This is my task. So are you ready, to travel into my mind of day dreams? Ready, set and tell.

   I was sitting in math class. Looking out the window, and before my eyes a scene unfolds. A bunch of hot guys were gathered outside the window. Then all of a sudden, my step father pops up. In his black trench coat, that seemed to slither around his body, as he crept around the "good looking" guys. They payed him no attention, as if he wasn't even there. He looked ominous, like a murderer lurking his victim. His gaze was attentive with group. He broke his gaze and locked eyes with me. His eyes glowed, his teeth barred and his hand casually slipped into his trench coat and he pulled out hand full of candy. He threw the candy in the air. For a minute I sighed with relief, untill I realized it was snowing out side. It wasn't Halloween. Why did he look like that? I looked again at my step father to see something shining in his hand as he stood over the brunet that was picking candy off the ground. I was going to scream run as I woke up abruptly to the sound of a bell. It had all just been my imagination.

No Where

No where to run.
No where to hide
I'm stuck in the middle.
With no one to confide.

I'm being pulled.
From side to side.
But nobody wants to hear.
The story I hide.

A story hidden.
By masked fear.
Slithering down my cheek.
With my eyes' final tear.

I hold my breath.

In desperation.

To hide my.

Sick obsession.

Of running away.

And never turning back.

No destination.

Just pitch black.

So here I stand

Lost in thought.

Of my parents.

Evil plot

Bullied No More

I walked through hallways with anticipation, to get out of this school. I was nearly free. Then I saw the bully coming my way. My hope sunk just long enough to let rage set in my eyes. I was tired of this. I was tired of being the victim and if she thought I wasn't going to stand up for myself, she was wrong. Her footsteps started to echo in my ears, for a moment I wanted to run. In that moment it was too late. She was at my side, whispering in my ear, "Did you miss me?"

I looked her in the eye's as she stepped back. Hatred was rising through my body. My fists were beginning to clench and I spat, "Miss you? Oh please I'd rather be thrown in a pit of snakes, that haven't eaten in days. So did I miss you? No I didn't. I miss my life without you, but I won't miss it for long." I let my eyes finish speaking for me. The bully retreated and I felt my face lift into a smile as I waved goodbye and hollered, "Have a good day." After that day I never had troubles with her again.

Fine, you caught me, with my walls down, crying. So tell me do you feel good about yourself? Standing there watching me fall, for the first time. No, not the first time, just the first time somebody else caught me. Do you feel good about yourself, seeing me fall apart and it all because of you? Because you wanted to prove that I was no better then you. Because you couldn't stand to see me stand tall. So tall that nothing could bring me down. Nothing until you came along. Until you offered me a your hand only to pull me from my stand. So fine you caught me. Do you feel the satisfaction you thought you would feel?

Silence

  There seems to be a silence lurking in his words. Something he's hiding from behind his teeth. A secret he refuses to share. We all know it's there, but nobody questions him out loud. We don't look him in the eyes as he speaks, there's a dark cruelty in them. Like even when he's smiling, there's something haunting him. A sight that he'll never get over, but yet we still don't ask. Instead we let our questions surround him in silence. And yet it's only when he's silent he speaks aloud. And when he speak aloud, this is what we hear. You could see the crystals from her breath as she screamed for help. No one around but him, her and them. Pain strikes in his stomach, it was searing through his body. He wouldn't have been able to bear it, if it wasn't for her scream. They threw her to the ground and he lunged at them. No other thoughts, other then saving her. Making them collapse to the ground. With his sweaty hands he grabbed her and tried to run. Tried being the key word. They grabbed him and beat him in till his body lay motionless. So laying there with one eye swollen shut and one eye open watching his true love die, instead of him. That night she lost two things, her life and one other thing that shall remain unnamed. Even though I'm sure you have a good idea what she lost. So now he wounders this world, with a silence lurking in his words and a story he never tells. He was 18 and she only 16, the day his world came crashing down.

Who's There?

Who is this person looking back at me, in my reflection. I don't recognize them, or maybe I don't want to. I don't want to realize that my eyes have gone cold. My lips have turned into an unchangeable smirk. My soft bone structure has gone hard. Maybe I don't want to realize that there's always one too many shadows lurking behind me. Maybe it's just the light that's tricking me or maybe the mirror is broken in some unfathomable way. There's all of these excuses flowing throw my veins. The truth is my mistakes have shaped me into a stranger, that is no longer recognizable. Who have I become?

Good Bye

Another dead body I should've known. Another grave stone with a name I can't remember. Another family member I could've had, but now they're gone. Leaving me wonder, what could've happened in my life if she was in it. Would my life feel more prosperous? Would my life turn into a chaos I couldn't fix. Not knowing is almost worst then knowing. Even if she killed you inside. It's like all of these questions that you'll never have an answer too. So I say goodbye to my great grandmother, even if I didn't know her.

A Letter of Truth

Dear Who Ever:
Let me reassure you about this blog. Let me tell you the truth behind my words, but promise one thing before we begin. Promise me that you won't judge me for the things that I say. You promise? Fine let's continue. These words are just words I pushed together by panic. Panic that if I don't say something meaningfull that I'll fall into a black pit of hatred. So I type these false words hoping they sound sincere. When really they're just lies, protecting me from the truth. The truth being that I say what I do not do. I stand here telling you something, and yet I do the other. I'm sorry but I don't plan on stopping either. I may not follow the words that I write but that doesn't mean that they're wrong. It just means that you should do the opposite of me. So maybe this wasn't reassuring but at least it was truthfull. And here's the thing if you read really carefully, you'll see a bit of me unmasked.

My Reflection

There beneath my heart is a hole where my lies are pooled. There I see my reflection. A reflection a camera can not capture. Mirror that can not reflect and eyes that cannot see. There is where my mistakes haunt me. They are getting higher and higher until it reaches the edges and overflows into my body. It is killing me inside, taking what does not belong to it. There is where my reflection lies.

Standing Still

A key with no lock. A puzzle with no pieces. A book with no words. These are all just simple mysteries. Piled on top of each other. Left in a room to linger with no known purpose. They're easily forgotten. We all keep moving and these mysteries are lingering in our shadow. There, but not solved. No on has an interest. No one cares to stand still long enough to figure it out. So somewhere in the world there is a kid with a key and no lock. No lock to open the door to his home. These are the mysteries of life. The mysteries in which could change a child's life, and a families love. So stand still, take a moment and look at the mysteries. Stand still and live in the moment.

21 Random Topics

1) Monkeys in jump suits.
2) Spiders in ballet slippers.
3) Roaring in a mall.
4) Guys with cool hair.
5) Fruit loop cereal.
6) What Justin Beiber would look like in a mini skirt?
7) Lucky Charms girlfriend.
8) Peter Pan's awesome tights.
9) Picky noise pickers.
10) Taylor Lautner as a girl.
11) Twilight with a hot Edward.
12) Make up tips.
13) Sharp pencils.
14) Men with big butts.
15) Hair styles for the unworthy.
16) People with funny shoes.
17) How many eye lashes does the average person have?
18) How much glue does it take to stick somebody to a wall?
19) Can you wear glasses upside down?
20) Shoes with poke a dots.
21) Robot teachers.

Pigs in T-Shirts

Is it appropriate? Is it ludicrous? Is it animal abuse? What is it and what are we going to do? What's your opinion on the matter? Well give me a comment and answer what you think it is, but right here is my opinion. It's nothing, just one more animal with clothing. One more piece of insanity that we choose to ignore. It's indecent to those animals around us. Just another circus freak. In the end it's just our entertainment. What are we going to do about it? Honestly most of us are gonna sit on our butts and laugh. This is human nature. Are you willing to fix what I know is wrong? And I hope you do too.

I'll Be

I'm practicing my superstar pose, high note, autograph, super smile, intelligence.

Yeah they all stop and stare with judgement in their eyes. Share a chuckle or two. A sentence of cruelty but i don't care, cause one day I'll be a

Superstar, jaw dropper, hot chick, skinny girl jealousy. Yeah I'll be the girl that walks on water. I'll swim in the sky. Play guitar with a harp. I'll concur men's hearts. Yeah one day I'll be me, the real me. Of course this all comes after

Teenage achene, frizzy hair, puberty, high school. And of course I wont forget, bad grades, ex boyfriends, bad decisions, fake tests and this invisibility cloak.
And when all this insanity is over I'll be me, the real me. I guess I could be a nerd working at a lab. A good person working as a counselor. I guess I could settle for normal but I'd rather not. So in till when I'm me, the real me.

I'm practicing my super star pose, high note, autograph, super smile, intelligence.
For when that day comes I'll be a super star, jaw dropper, hot chick, skinny girl jealousy.
Yeah I'll be the girl that walks on water. I'll swim in the sky. Play guitar with a harp. I'll concur men's hearts. Yeah one day I'll be me, the real me. Of course this all comes after
One day I'll be me, the real me. Maybe not today or the next but one day I'll be me, the real me.